from previous...

....she felt her ammi and baba were  behaving  odd for quite some days,  soon  her suspicions  got cleared up after her finals,   one of tge matrimonial proposals  was accepted,  mir salik was an only brother to  his two married sisters to to two brothers in Italy,  their children were still small,   sisters were working women,  mir  salik s mother insisted they returned home  who  eagerly  expected  salik to quickly get married,  they lived in their family home  and had a sixteenth grade government job, he looked alright,  ammi showed  rahman his picture  , she looked at it carefully  to finally make a comment he didn't look a hero but  she was ready to make a hero out of him 

Bhayya naughtily  said  or she could turn the groom to zero 

Baba thought aloud he had full faith in his daughter  who  was educated  well and practical and  sensible  and definitely  deserved  happiness in life  she would work for,  baba patted  her shoulders  and rahman turned to look at her brother  and  pulled  her imaginary  collars high stiffening her neck  twenty two and  already  completed her studies  that was the most proper thing to do ammi argued 

Baju   next morning  was told who thought  rahman  was too immature to get married so soon though 

Baju wanted rahman should be given more time to enjoy  her carefree  unmarried life  at her parents house 

Rahmin  said she would enjoy life after marriage to which baju  thought otherwise  that  married life was not meant for enjoying  oneself but it was a commitment  to follow  a disciplined  life and perform  duties  and shoulder responsibilities  to make your marriage work 

from previous...

....on the wedding day  rahman spread out all the  things on the bed,  and began ironing  a frock, ammi got worried seeing her wearing so much  , , rahman became more worried  for ammi  , what was the matter with  it

Ammi didn't like unmarried girls wearing heavy makeup and over dressed  for any occasion,  ammi was picking up each and every stuff carefully  investigating  it with her scrutinizing  gaze, 

But she argued  and asked ammi to see  the dupatta too, that would  cover her entirely  and overshadow  all of her  attempts  to appear  pretty 

Ammi insisted  firmly to change her earnings for  another pair  more simple and less decorative,  pushing aside  her filmi  over dramatic  piece of jewelry,  and not to bother  to put on so many  dozens of bangles  when  just two on each wrist were sufficient,  the silky glass bangles  were quite pretty  but  no use wearing  that heavy  gold set 

Rahman was  put off and sulky  and declared sge wasn't  going to attend the function 

zaat e aurat...

... theirs was a dead relationship,  she placed  the soup bowl  on the side table  as he lay weak and limp on the bed, she  looked at him  , his eyes were shut,  , she waved her right hand before him,   quickly his eyes flew open and he caught her hand,  ,  what all showed in his  sleepy eyes only she  could interpret  clearly,  but she no longer  was eager to know what all was  suppressed or expressed  in his eyes, , she was no more interested in his words and activities,  after all  theirs was a dead relationship  still loosely  attached to a flimsy  string of breaths 

He asked her to  feed him  the soup , his eyes  flooding with emotions,  , she sat down  listless by  his side on the edge of the cot stirring the soup in the bowl  with a spoon  lifeless, 

A sudden desire  crossed her unhappy mind  to say something sweet,  something  soothing  in a honey tone but couldn't  muster enough courage  and tge soup was finished,  picking up the empty soup bowl she left the room  with a blank expressionless face 

She scowled and scolded herself  for  getting crazy , he thought  desires are desires for  they remain unfulfilled 

sakoon se mehroom....

....what  exactly  defines  peacefulness,  it is merely  a name given to a feeling  but  it is so very rarely  evoked in a person  that  it seems impossible to reach that state of mind  but when  and if someone  succeeds in realizing  that  awareness   he finds himself  amidst  all the worldy  problems  and personal apprehensions  feeling  at peace and satisfied,  , unable to express  this  situation  he frequently  keeps  showing his  gratitude towards  the almighty  for granting him all he wants,  his mind and heart  is filled  with  belief  that he is fully  supported  by the lord,  that He will quickly  pull him out of the darkness,   the faithful  is so strong believer   , his faith so solid  that  his faith  emerges  stronger  than  the overshadowing  hassles  in life,   his faith is his only strength  and  conscience 

The question arises what is it that makes  today's  man  unendingly  look for worldy  profits and  try  to find solace in tbe materialistic  lifestyle,  when  true  happiness lies only  in his state of mind  and honesty,   tge feeling   and  strength he finds  within  when he  is in trouble  and   helpless  but hus inner faith  keeps him going  even when  the times are hard  , no quick solution  at hand,  but still  being  grateful for  all he still has  ,  most importantly  modern man has  become thankless  habitually,  forgetting  to be grateful is ignoring  one's  blessings,  cursing  hus own fate, abusing   and comparing   endlessly   with  others  in better off positions as otgers lower to him in status wish to be  in his place 

page 155...

.....now  look  at it like this,  nanaz is learnt ,  rules  on how to hajj are learned,   from smallest to biggest   things  are taught and learnt  , car driving  , computer operating,  how to run a small business  , how to manage  an institute  , for  every  single   system  one  is expected  to learn  to better  manage  his  business  , isn't  home and family  also  a responsibility  one must learn to  be able to competently  handle   it , she was  explaining  her  on the  drive back  home,  was  anything as important  as family and home  possible  to manage without experience,  without  willingness  without  understanding,   do you know  what makes  Satan   encourage his  followers  and  who pleases  him the most,  the car  stopped at the red signal  and she turned her  face to look at her 

Satan is pleased  by those who  divide  the married couples  by creating  misunderstanding between them,  so the spouses  doubt  each other,  because  it weakens the family system  and weak  doubting  families  make  a sick  society,  such  weak doubting minds    turn aggressive  m , iblis enjoys  unfaithful  community that challenges the authority of  the almighty  creator 

page 150..

....so zavyar what are your plans  for marriage 

 He deposited the amount in the bank and turned to ask him 

He had been  thinking over this matter for quite  some  days  lifted his head to look at him 

Do you really think  it's a good idea  and I should be married though you  know  it so well  I am  not the same zavyar,  times  changed  ne , his tone was bitter and questioning 

Life always changes everyone  this is life

Zacyar seemed exhausted 

Making the best of everything Life  gave  wasn't possible,  failures were  pulling him down , things  were  out of his control  , he had  to  try again  to  rectify   the mistakes,  , those who tried   sincerely success  followed them,  but why was he no trying  ,through  Anni  they had got the news of zarmaqnoon   getting married